If you ask someone what their favorite TV channel is, most people probably won't say HGTV. Except maybe my mom. And other moms. Most people don't seek it out. No one crashes after a long day and says to themselves, "man, I'd really like to watch someone argue about paint colors and rip out flooring. That would really relax and intrigue me right now."
But, not unlike a dementor, it manages to find us and suck us in.
Two words: House Hunters.
House Hunters is the gateway drug of home improvement shows.
One day, you're flipping through channels and leave it on House Hunters by accident. Just in the background. No big deal, you think.
But somehow--I can only imagine they use some sort of subliminal messaging--you become invested in the show in a matter of about 2.5 minutes.
Soon enough you find yourself scrolling through the guide and thinking to yourself, "Oo! House Hunters!"
And then you slowly discover the terrible truth:
House Hunters is ALWAYS on.
Regular House Hunters. House Hunters International. House Hunters on Vacation. Where does it end?
You think to yourself, "this is awesome! I'll never run out of episodes--there's so many of them. There's no way I'll ever see them all."
Oh, sweet amateur.
You will. You will reach a point where you've seen at least half of the ones you turn on. And that, my friends, is a harrowing day.
You will also wake up one day and realize that not only are you watching House Hunters, but you've expanded to Property Brothers, Color Splash and Design Star. Who AM I?? You may think to yourself.
And that is how they get you. Also the fact that they don't put commercials in between the end of one episode and the beginning of the next keeps you invested long enough to watch "just one more episode."
I've noticed that my experience with House Hunters is not unique. More and more people are openly admitting their addiction (at least via Twitter and Facebook).
So just know, fellow House Hunters addict, you're not alone.
And there IS help available.
Well, I don't actually know that for sure, since I've never sought it out. But we could form a House Hunters support group for anyone looking to get their life back:
SUPPORT GROUP MEMBER 1: It's just that I think I'm starting to have severely unrealistic expectations of what my first house should look like.
SUPPORT GROUP MEMBER 2: All they wanted was hardwood floors, granite counter tops, stainless steel appliances and an open concept! [sobs] Was that too much to ask??
SUPPORT GROUP MEMBER 3: My wife isn't being supportive of my new career path. After watching so many episodes of House Hunters I feel I have the equivalent of a degree in couples' counseling, and she doesn't seem to agree.
Do any of these sound familiar? Just let it out. Let it all out.
Are you also addicted to House Hunters?