To Whomever Keeps Adding Nonsense to the Dictionary

I get it, I guess. I mean, to understand something, it helps to put a label on it. To confine it. To put it in a box or constrain it in some way. To make it bow to your will. Perhaps the old wordsmiths just don't have a category for words like "selfie" and "hashtag." Perhaps putting them in dictionaries and calling them the word of the year helps them cope with the fact that, even after hiring a 25-year-old to write the definition for them (and not paying them because of the experience and exposure they will get), they still don't fully understand what they mean.

Perhaps just embracing the totally incorrect definition of "literally," which is LITERALLY the opposite of what "literally" actually means, puts them back in their happy place in their minds where 14-year-olds aren't yammering on about how they are literally going to die when they see Harry Styles. Perhaps it just helps keep the crazy away so their brains don't explode from overexposure to a culture overrun with Buzzfeed "listicles" (a word I just learned) and meme-ified Ben Franklins.

But I'm here to tell you, oh wordsmiths of old, that we do not have to succumb to this. We are better than this. YOU are better than this. You can be strong, sirs and madams. You can resist. I know it's exhausting. The Internet is an exhausting place. But we, the sane few of the generation I REFUSE to call millenials, will stand by you and help you.


Because slang does not have to be legitimized. That's why it's slang. We can say "selfie" and "because science" all day long, and it doesn't mean you have to rush to your typewriters (I assume in this situation you are clinging to yours) and document it for all time. Plus it sucks the fun out of everything. It's no longer ironic to say "meteor is hurling towards the earth but it's going to be okay because science" (which I did find amusing), if you officially include this instance in the regular usage of the word "because."

Maybe you’re just trying to keep with the times and be hip to the lingo. But that’s not what we need. We need structure and rules and definitions that actually make sense. Without them, where would we even get slang? If you adopt slang into normal word usage, people will just create slang from that, and no one wants second-hand slang. It gets ugly.

I know this is a total grammar nerd cry, but let's just let slang be slang, okay? It's more fun that way. And no one gets hurt. Or called a "millenial."

Do you think slang should be added to the dictionary? What's your least favorite OR newest slang (internet?) term you know?