fashion line

Adam Levine Launches the World's Laziest Fashion Line at K-mart

adam levine white tee

Some pop icons are known for their style. Lauren Conrad. Emma Watson. For some reason, Kim Kardashian. People look at them and think, man, I'd love to have a reasonably-priced version of that outfit. Which is why two of the three of those people have fashion lines at Kohl's. (I mean buy me anything Lauren Conrad and I'm good to go. Seriously.) As well they should.

Someone who should not? Adam Levine. But he does now.

Look. I love Adam Levine as much as the next warm-blooded American with two ears and a heart, but a fashion line? At K-Mart?

First of all isn't his style just white v-necks and skinny jeans? Don't they already sell those? A reasonably priced version of a white v-neck is called the Hanes tagless tee. Done and done.

Second of all, let's just be real here for a second. Does anyone still shop at K-Mart? They do a LOT of advertising for a store that every time I see their storefront, the inside is empty and the K is like hanging off and there are rust marks where the m-a-r-t used to be in a strip mall that also housed things like a payday loan service and a recycling center in the parking lot. I'm asking.

Is K-Mart just the low-hanging fruit of the fashion industry? Do they have a screening process at all?

I just did some research, and here are some OTHER people who currently have K-Mart lines:

Nicki Minaj (WHAT) Sofia Vergara (I love her but she is not the everywoman.) Jaclyn Smith, a former Charlie's Angel Selena Gomez

I'm just saying this seems a little bit like a motley crew. And now we're adding Adam Levine?

PICK A MARKET, KMART. Do the people who shop at K-Mart really want to dress like Nicki Minaj or Adam Levine? Are we even playing to our strengths here? Again, I'm asking.

The article goes on to say that Adam Levine's fashion line will consist of cargo jackets, button down shirts and baseball caps. AKA the most generic things ever. Which is what Adam Levine wears. If he even wears a shirt at all.

He looks like Adam Levine because of his hair and his tattoos and his torso that seems to ever end. Not because of what he wears, which does not have a style.

I don't know who is behind this but maybe they just needed a guy for their collection of celebrities and Adam was the only one fame-hungry enough to do it. He has a perfume line too, you know. Which apparently is NOT selling out, you guys, even though he tweeted that celebrity fragrances should be punishable by death two years ago [see article here for more info on that trainwreck].

So Adam Levine, you just keep doing you and making money and we'll just keep not shopping at K-mart.

Who do you think K-mart should enlist next? Better yet, what do you think Adam Levine should endorse next? I vote temporary tattoos.